


'what became of you'

by spheeris1



Category: Shoujo Kakumei Utena | Revolutionary Girl Utena
Genre: Amnesia, F/F, Gen, Love, Post-Series, Utena POV
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-03-22
Updated: 2013-03-22
Packaged: 2017-12-06 03:11:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 532
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/730858
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/spheeris1/pseuds/spheeris1





	'what became of you'

~ ~

She doesn’t remember much and so she decides that there must not be much to remember in the first place. And the doctors give her medicine and the psychiatrists pat her on the back and the police relay the details of some kind of accident – she was stepping off of a sidewalk and a car clipped her, just like a bird being shot in the wing… she toppled over and her glassy eyes stared as her own blood filled up the spaces where the pavement was cracked…

…only, sometimes, she remembers it all differently – she was crying and her hands were raw with working, just like a man digging through layers of dry dirt… she reached out for someone and her tears turned the world into glass…

/

But the world always shatters.

/

She’ll linger – sometimes – over colors that fall into her lap; a white too bright or a violet deep enough to sink into. She’ll stare – sometimes – at the bands of gold around fingers or gardens that grow wild. She’ll wake up in the middle of the night – sometimes - and the back of her shirt will be soaked through with sweat and every part of her body will begin to hurt and she’ll cover up her ears because those bells are ringing again and that’s just about the worst sound she has ever heard…

They up her medication. They write down notes and peer at her like a lab-rat. They call her a cold case.

..and she doesn’t remember much but sometimes it feels as though someone is trying so very hard to remember her.

/

_“The only time I’ve ever been really happy…”_

/

She doesn’t remember much.

And yet she remembers to run as fast as she can – pushing past onlookers, shoving through this shocked crowd. And she remembers to wrap an arm around this woman’s waist – as the lights change, as tires suddenly hit the curb. And she remembers to pull this woman close as they twist and turn – like a well-worn dance, knowing exactly when to dip and to spin. And she remembers to let her own shoulder take this blow – from a dirty street or from a silver blade, against cold concrete or an arena floor…

And she remembers a single name – syllables so familiar and so settled upon her tongue – right before she blacks out.

“Himemiya…”

/

_“…was when I was with you.”_

/

No, she doesn’t remember much.

And the doctors comment on her bad luck with oncoming traffic. And the psychiatrists wonder at the state of her mental health. And the police point to her picture in the newspaper – ‘Daring Rescue At Midday!’ – and raise their collective eyebrows.

But when she awakens this time, a hand is resting within her own – all soft and soothing, tracing the lines upon her palm even in slumber – and so she decides that the only thing she ever needed to recall is sitting in this very room.

/

No, she doesn’t remember much at all…

/

…But Utena remembers this woman sleeping by her side and Utena remembers the sweet sensation of old longings – they tug at her lips even now, pulling them upwards into a smile…

/

…And so she remembers Anthy Himemiya.

/

(end)


End file.
